I’ve been feeling strange lately, to say the least.
I haven’t been unhappy. I’ve actually been happier these past few months than ever before.
I just keep getting weird flashes of emotion on top of that happiness, and I don’t know how to handle them. Sudden highs and lows that catch me off guard and drain me, sometimes turn me into a monster that wrecks everyone’s day.
Maybe it’s hormones. Maybe it’s stress. Maybe it’s uncertainty.
Maybe it’s the heat of the summer, or the fact that summer’s ending soon.
Whatever it is, it’s crushing my productivity.
I have no motivation. I just want to do the things I enjoy and ignore everything else (anything that requires effort or isn’t fun).
I’m barely writing anymore. When I get the urge to write, it fades into something very depressing the second I actually start doing it.
Writing used to be my endless joy and source of relief. Now, I’m not sure what it is.
I think the thrill has faded because I’ve found happiness and relief in every other aspect of my life. Naturally, I don’t need to seek it from writing anymore, so my mind is trying to push writing out.
But I don’t want to stop writing. Ever. I think I just need to come to terms with the fact that I’m writing now simply because I love it, not because I’m gaining anything from it. Yes, I think coming to terms with that is why that depressing feeling comes each time I write, and maybe that’s why I’m getting all the mood swings in general.
Lots in my life is changing, and I’m coming to terms with it. Maybe now that I’ve realized that, I won’t feel so unstable.
I hope you’re all doing well, and I hope you enjoyed these pictures. Thanks for letting me talk through things rather than making a legit post about this outfit. I feel much better now, even though this only took a few minutes to jot down.
I also hope you seriously consider layering spaghetti strap dresses over sleeved shirts (if you’re not already). The look is always stunning, no matter what type of sleeves.
Bye for now ❤
ireallyhateconverse 